Is beauty only skin deep? And does it only lie in the eyes of the beholder?
There is no one woman in the world who does not want to look great and beautiful. But of course, beauty has a different definition from one person to another. In fact, it is a totally subjective issue and nobody has the most correct answer to it.
For a native African man, Scarlet Ortiz or better known as Maria Clara of NTV7’s Secreto De Amor, is ugly and unappealing because their definition of beauty is black-skinned, hard, curly hair with only a small piece of cloth covering the below private part. If you ask a Malaysian man, he might say that she is drop dead gorgeous, someone he might be dreaming of in his sleep every night. But try asking another Latino man. You might be surprised at his reply. He might just say that she is OK-looking, simply because women around him are all “Maria Clara” look-alikes.
When we talk about beauty, there is so much to touch on. Too wide a topic to be discussed in just a few lines. Too many things to cover – from head to toe. But it never failed to inspire women all over the world whenever the topic is brought up, be it at the workplace, at home and even during casual chats over a cup of coffee.
Some may consider Normala Samsudin as the most beautiful woman in Malaysia. Why? Because after three kids and approaching 40 years of age, she still looks as stunning as 20-year olds. Or maybe you’d prefer Aida Radzwill (formerly known as Aida Rahim), who is gorgeous and sexy at 40 +? And moreover, she married a much younger man! Anita Sarawak may also be on your list. At 50+, I think she looks superb! Ever wondered whether we would look like that (or maybe a little like that) when we reached 50? Well, I believe the answers are all in our hands. How we shape our lives today, will influence how we look tomorrow.
So, for this issue, I want to bring you into the most talked about beauty scenario – the Botox injection. It has been going around rapidly I could see. Whenever someone looks good, say after many childbirths or after a certain age, people will associate them with Botox. What is it actually? Is it bad to do it? Is it immoral? Is it against the religion? These questions kept playing in mind. I even thought of having one after I read about Kris Dayanti, the beautiful Indonesian singer-actress who did it and was not ashamed to admit it. What does it do really?
Botox is hailed as the fountain of youth in a syringe, as I quoted from The Star dated April 7, 2004. It works best especially in smaller, thinner muscles, such as those around the eyes, on crow’s feet or vertical lines between the eyebrows rather than on the wrinkles around the mouth, chin or neck. But, not everyone can go through this procedure successfully.
It is just like slimming pills in the market. For example, I might tell you that you should try taking the traditional capsules which contained traditional herbs to slim you down because it worked on me. Then, you gave it a go. And it didn’t work on you. It is different for each individual. The reaction is dissimilar. Same goes with this Botox injection. It was perfect for Kris Dayanti but it might just be the opposite for you and me.
For your basic information, you should not even dream of having Botox done if you are pregnant or breast feeding. You also could not have it if you are currently taking medications like calcium channel blockers which are used to treat high blood pressure. Please make sure that it is 100% safe for you and your future. The only side effect it should have on you is making you look younger, better and more beautiful than before. So, if it is the reverse that happened, then you should just forget about it or not even consider it in the first place!
Another important factor that you have to remember is to have it done with a qualified professional. Meaning, you should go to a plastic surgeon or the dermatologist, as they can determine whether the procedure is safe for you. Never ever put the word “cheap” anywhere near when considering whether or not to have Botox. This will lead you to just settle with a spa-like facility or storefront salon where the injection will be given by a non-professional like an aesthetician or a cosmetologist. You must also keep in your diary that the injection has to be repeated every three to six months to maintain the youthful results.
How does it sound so far? Are you already half way in deciding to have Botox some time after this month’s pay check? Whatever your decision is, just ensure that it is truly what you want. After all, trying something once would not hurt so badly. The one due in the next three months should just pass you by, then. Appearing perfect for 3 months would be inexplicable. Outstanding the crowd for just 3 months would give a tremendous boost to your self esteem.
I wonder how I would look like after Botox. I wonder what are the obvious changes it will bring. I wonder how it would affect me emotionally. I wonder whether it really is a short cut to a more youthful and beautiful me. Keep wondering because it keeps your mind working. So Botox, are we meant to be? And is it true after all that beauty is only skin deep? Does it only lie in the eyes of its beholder?
Monday, April 28, 2008
LITERARY APPRECIATION 3
A Poem for My Baby - Yusri bin Yahya
Dearest Baby, I hope that this birthday will bring a better life for you and me.
Happy 37th birthday, darling!!! (3 May 2008)
How Much Do I Love Thee?
by Elizabeth Browning
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints,
--I love thee with the breath,Smiles, tears, of all my life!
--and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.
Dearest Baby, I hope that this birthday will bring a better life for you and me.
Happy 37th birthday, darling!!! (3 May 2008)
How Much Do I Love Thee?
by Elizabeth Browning
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints,
--I love thee with the breath,Smiles, tears, of all my life!
--and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.
TIPS FOR US-NESS 7
Sexy Turn Ons
Want to know other ways to turn on your partner? Try out one or all of these:
Want to know other ways to turn on your partner? Try out one or all of these:
- Appear around the house semi-naked like when setting the dinner table with only an apron on.
- Run your hands gently down your partner’s spines, and slowly kiss it up.
- Gentle smooches on her breasts and on her inner thighs.
- Give gentle and soft bites on his or her bottom.
- Run your lips all around his or her body.
- Walk slowly from behind and grab him/ her and whisper slowly into the ears words of love, then kiss the neck softly.
- Bite on his/her ears gently
- Kissing gently on the tummy while licking softly on the belly button.
- Brush your breasts slowly on his body.
- Phone sex or send sexy SMS to your partner once in a while.
Don’t forget to try them out! Good luck!
FUN TIME!
The Pickle Slicer
Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill indicated that he'd be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.
One day a few weeks later, Bill came home absolutely ashen. His wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong.
"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked. "Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?"
"Oh, Bill, you didn't." "Yes, I did." "My God, Bill, what happened?"
"I got fired." "No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?”
“Ohhh, she got fired too!”
Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill indicated that he'd be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.
One day a few weeks later, Bill came home absolutely ashen. His wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong.
"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked. "Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?"
"Oh, Bill, you didn't." "Yes, I did." "My God, Bill, what happened?"
"I got fired." "No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?”
“Ohhh, she got fired too!”
ABOUT OUR KIDS 6
Seven Common Discipline Mistakes Parents Make--And How to Avoid Them
Discipline is not a happy word. But without it kids grow up acting like savages. Tamara Eberlein shares seven common discipline pitfalls and what to do about them:
1. Losing your temper. When parents lose their cool and blow up, kids know it. Danny, eight, hit his four-year-old sister, Sally. Sally screams and Mother comes running. She yells, "You know better than to hit your sister!" She grabs Danny by the arm and pushes him down in a chair. Danny has learned that the way to get attention is to yell. When you habitually yell, your children will soon be yelling back at you.
A better way: Stop the violence. Take both of his hands in yours. Look him straight in the eye and, with a prayer in your heart, firmly say: "You know that we do not allow hitting. Violence is wrong. It makes God feel bad. I am disappointed in you! Do you understand? There will be consequences. You will sit in this chair for 20 minutes and think about your behavior. Then you will go to your room and write a one-page letter to me telling why hitting is not allowed." To manifest passion toward an erring child is to increase the evil. It arouses the worst passions of the child and leads him to feel that you do not care for him.
2. Parents disagree on rules. Sometimes parents disagree on rules. But they must always present a united front. Children are masters at the game of "divide and conquer." Together, set guidelines for your children's homework, chores, bedtime, plus prohibitions against hitting, stealing, and lying. One parent should not be responsible for all discipline. And, of course, never contradict your spouse's orders.
3. Don't treat kids like little adults. We should listen to our children and respect them but do not run your home like a democracy. Raymond, age 6, grabs a video from the shelf at the super market: "Please Mom, I want this video!" "No, Raymond, it's too violent." "But Mom, all the kids at school watch it." It is not necessary to explain all the reasons. "Because, I said so." should be sufficient.
As kids get older, take time to explain and ask for their input, but never compromise your principles.
4. Don't bribe or misuse rewards. "If you two will stop fussing, I will give you a special treat for dinner tonight." This strategy may work for a time, but sooner or later they will start misbehaving to get prizes. A bribe is the wrong way to motivate children. The best rewards are intrinsic--the good feeling that comes from doing right. "It feels good to do something for someone, doesn't it, Larry?" When we do right God rewards us with a sense of peace and joy.
5. Praising too much or too little. Affirmation is a powerful strategy for building self-worth. But if we praise too much, the child will feel let down when he doesn't receive it. Children can become "praise-junkies." "Wow, this report card is great! You are such a smart boy!" To label a child as "smart" is flattery. Give affirmation for positive behavior. "Tommy, I am so proud of the way you helped clean the kitchen. Thank you!" Children will repeat behavior that brings appreciation.
6. Inconsistent discipline. Karen, age 5, was lying on the sofa, sobbing. "Why are you crying, Karen?" "Cause, last time I used a bad word you laughed at me. Now, you take away my dolly." If you are erratic or inconsistent in your discipline they will catch you every time. If they get a laugh one time and punishment the next, they will become confused.
Mother knelt by Karen. "Honey, I'm sorry. Mother was not consistent in her rules. I will try to do better next time." Karen responded with a big hug.
7. Avoid inappropriate punishment. The purpose of discipline is to teach, not to punish. The punishment should be a natural and logical consequence of the misbehavior. Example: When a child abuses television, the logical consequence would be to take away television privileges. If a child refuses to come to meals when he is called, a natural consequence would be cold food or no food. When a teenage boy comes in after his curfew on Friday night, a logical consequence would be to ground him on Saturday night. But to ground him for two weeks would be inappropriate. Children know intuitively what is fair and right.
Adapted from Tamara Eberlein, Redbook, June 1993.
Discipline is not a happy word. But without it kids grow up acting like savages. Tamara Eberlein shares seven common discipline pitfalls and what to do about them:
1. Losing your temper. When parents lose their cool and blow up, kids know it. Danny, eight, hit his four-year-old sister, Sally. Sally screams and Mother comes running. She yells, "You know better than to hit your sister!" She grabs Danny by the arm and pushes him down in a chair. Danny has learned that the way to get attention is to yell. When you habitually yell, your children will soon be yelling back at you.
A better way: Stop the violence. Take both of his hands in yours. Look him straight in the eye and, with a prayer in your heart, firmly say: "You know that we do not allow hitting. Violence is wrong. It makes God feel bad. I am disappointed in you! Do you understand? There will be consequences. You will sit in this chair for 20 minutes and think about your behavior. Then you will go to your room and write a one-page letter to me telling why hitting is not allowed." To manifest passion toward an erring child is to increase the evil. It arouses the worst passions of the child and leads him to feel that you do not care for him.
2. Parents disagree on rules. Sometimes parents disagree on rules. But they must always present a united front. Children are masters at the game of "divide and conquer." Together, set guidelines for your children's homework, chores, bedtime, plus prohibitions against hitting, stealing, and lying. One parent should not be responsible for all discipline. And, of course, never contradict your spouse's orders.
3. Don't treat kids like little adults. We should listen to our children and respect them but do not run your home like a democracy. Raymond, age 6, grabs a video from the shelf at the super market: "Please Mom, I want this video!" "No, Raymond, it's too violent." "But Mom, all the kids at school watch it." It is not necessary to explain all the reasons. "Because, I said so." should be sufficient.
As kids get older, take time to explain and ask for their input, but never compromise your principles.
4. Don't bribe or misuse rewards. "If you two will stop fussing, I will give you a special treat for dinner tonight." This strategy may work for a time, but sooner or later they will start misbehaving to get prizes. A bribe is the wrong way to motivate children. The best rewards are intrinsic--the good feeling that comes from doing right. "It feels good to do something for someone, doesn't it, Larry?" When we do right God rewards us with a sense of peace and joy.
5. Praising too much or too little. Affirmation is a powerful strategy for building self-worth. But if we praise too much, the child will feel let down when he doesn't receive it. Children can become "praise-junkies." "Wow, this report card is great! You are such a smart boy!" To label a child as "smart" is flattery. Give affirmation for positive behavior. "Tommy, I am so proud of the way you helped clean the kitchen. Thank you!" Children will repeat behavior that brings appreciation.
6. Inconsistent discipline. Karen, age 5, was lying on the sofa, sobbing. "Why are you crying, Karen?" "Cause, last time I used a bad word you laughed at me. Now, you take away my dolly." If you are erratic or inconsistent in your discipline they will catch you every time. If they get a laugh one time and punishment the next, they will become confused.
Mother knelt by Karen. "Honey, I'm sorry. Mother was not consistent in her rules. I will try to do better next time." Karen responded with a big hug.
7. Avoid inappropriate punishment. The purpose of discipline is to teach, not to punish. The punishment should be a natural and logical consequence of the misbehavior. Example: When a child abuses television, the logical consequence would be to take away television privileges. If a child refuses to come to meals when he is called, a natural consequence would be cold food or no food. When a teenage boy comes in after his curfew on Friday night, a logical consequence would be to ground him on Saturday night. But to ground him for two weeks would be inappropriate. Children know intuitively what is fair and right.
Adapted from Tamara Eberlein, Redbook, June 1993.
ABOUT OUR KIDS 5
Seven Common Discipline Mistakes Parents Make--And How to Avoid Them
Discipline is not a happy word. But without it kids grow up acting like savages. Tamara Eberlein shares seven common discipline pitfalls and what to do about them:
1. Losing your temper. When parents lose their cool and blow up, kids know it. Danny, eight, hit his four-year-old sister, Sally. Sally screams and Mother comes running. She yells, "You know better than to hit your sister!" She grabs Danny by the arm and pushes him down in a chair. Danny has learned that the way to get attention is to yell. When you habitually yell, your children will soon be yelling back at you.
A better way: Stop the violence. Take both of his hands in yours. Look him straight in the eye and, with a prayer in your heart, firmly say: "You know that we do not allow hitting. Violence is wrong. It makes God feel bad. I am disappointed in you! Do you understand? There will be consequences. You will sit in this chair for 20 minutes and think about your behavior. Then you will go to your room and write a one-page letter to me telling why hitting is not allowed." To manifest passion toward an erring child is to increase the evil. It arouses the worst passions of the child and leads him to feel that you do not care for him.
2. Parents disagree on rules. Sometimes parents disagree on rules. But they must always present a united front. Children are masters at the game of "divide and conquer." Together, set guidelines for your children's homework, chores, bedtime, plus prohibitions against hitting, stealing, and lying. One parent should not be responsible for all discipline. And, of course, never contradict your spouse's orders.
3. Don't treat kids like little adults. We should listen to our children and respect them but do not run your home like a democracy. Raymond, age 6, grabs a video from the shelf at the super market: "Please Mom, I want this video!" "No, Raymond, it's too violent." "But Mom, all the kids at school watch it." It is not necessary to explain all the reasons. "Because, I said so." should be sufficient.
As kids get older, take time to explain and ask for their input, but never compromise your principles.
4. Don't bribe or misuse rewards. "If you two will stop fussing, I will give you a special treat for dinner tonight." This strategy may work for a time, but sooner or later they will start misbehaving to get prizes. A bribe is the wrong way to motivate children. The best rewards are intrinsic--the good feeling that comes from doing right. "It feels good to do something for someone, doesn't it, Larry?" When we do right God rewards us with a sense of peace and joy.
5. Praising too much or too little. Affirmation is a powerful strategy for building self-worth. But if we praise too much, the child will feel let down when he doesn't receive it. Children can become "praise-junkies." "Wow, this report card is great! You are such a smart boy!" To label a child as "smart" is flattery. Give affirmation for positive behavior. "Tommy, I am so proud of the way you helped clean the kitchen. Thank you!" Children will repeat behavior that brings appreciation.
6. Inconsistent discipline. Karen, age 5, was lying on the sofa, sobbing. "Why are you crying, Karen?" "Cause, last time I used a bad word you laughed at me. Now, you take away my dolly." If you are erratic or inconsistent in your discipline they will catch you every time. If they get a laugh one time and punishment the next, they will become confused.
Mother knelt by Karen. "Honey, I'm sorry. Mother was not consistent in her rules. I will try to do better next time." Karen responded with a big hug.
7. Avoid inappropriate punishment. The purpose of discipline is to teach, not to punish. The punishment should be a natural and logical consequence of the misbehavior. Example: When a child abuses television, the logical consequence would be to take away television privileges. If a child refuses to come to meals when he is called, a natural consequence would be cold food or no food. When a teenage boy comes in after his curfew on Friday night, a logical consequence would be to ground him on Saturday night. But to ground him for two weeks would be inappropriate.
Children know intuitively what is fair and right.
Adapted from Tamara Eberlein, Redbook, June 1993.
Discipline is not a happy word. But without it kids grow up acting like savages. Tamara Eberlein shares seven common discipline pitfalls and what to do about them:
1. Losing your temper. When parents lose their cool and blow up, kids know it. Danny, eight, hit his four-year-old sister, Sally. Sally screams and Mother comes running. She yells, "You know better than to hit your sister!" She grabs Danny by the arm and pushes him down in a chair. Danny has learned that the way to get attention is to yell. When you habitually yell, your children will soon be yelling back at you.
A better way: Stop the violence. Take both of his hands in yours. Look him straight in the eye and, with a prayer in your heart, firmly say: "You know that we do not allow hitting. Violence is wrong. It makes God feel bad. I am disappointed in you! Do you understand? There will be consequences. You will sit in this chair for 20 minutes and think about your behavior. Then you will go to your room and write a one-page letter to me telling why hitting is not allowed." To manifest passion toward an erring child is to increase the evil. It arouses the worst passions of the child and leads him to feel that you do not care for him.
2. Parents disagree on rules. Sometimes parents disagree on rules. But they must always present a united front. Children are masters at the game of "divide and conquer." Together, set guidelines for your children's homework, chores, bedtime, plus prohibitions against hitting, stealing, and lying. One parent should not be responsible for all discipline. And, of course, never contradict your spouse's orders.
3. Don't treat kids like little adults. We should listen to our children and respect them but do not run your home like a democracy. Raymond, age 6, grabs a video from the shelf at the super market: "Please Mom, I want this video!" "No, Raymond, it's too violent." "But Mom, all the kids at school watch it." It is not necessary to explain all the reasons. "Because, I said so." should be sufficient.
As kids get older, take time to explain and ask for their input, but never compromise your principles.
4. Don't bribe or misuse rewards. "If you two will stop fussing, I will give you a special treat for dinner tonight." This strategy may work for a time, but sooner or later they will start misbehaving to get prizes. A bribe is the wrong way to motivate children. The best rewards are intrinsic--the good feeling that comes from doing right. "It feels good to do something for someone, doesn't it, Larry?" When we do right God rewards us with a sense of peace and joy.
5. Praising too much or too little. Affirmation is a powerful strategy for building self-worth. But if we praise too much, the child will feel let down when he doesn't receive it. Children can become "praise-junkies." "Wow, this report card is great! You are such a smart boy!" To label a child as "smart" is flattery. Give affirmation for positive behavior. "Tommy, I am so proud of the way you helped clean the kitchen. Thank you!" Children will repeat behavior that brings appreciation.
6. Inconsistent discipline. Karen, age 5, was lying on the sofa, sobbing. "Why are you crying, Karen?" "Cause, last time I used a bad word you laughed at me. Now, you take away my dolly." If you are erratic or inconsistent in your discipline they will catch you every time. If they get a laugh one time and punishment the next, they will become confused.
Mother knelt by Karen. "Honey, I'm sorry. Mother was not consistent in her rules. I will try to do better next time." Karen responded with a big hug.
7. Avoid inappropriate punishment. The purpose of discipline is to teach, not to punish. The punishment should be a natural and logical consequence of the misbehavior. Example: When a child abuses television, the logical consequence would be to take away television privileges. If a child refuses to come to meals when he is called, a natural consequence would be cold food or no food. When a teenage boy comes in after his curfew on Friday night, a logical consequence would be to ground him on Saturday night. But to ground him for two weeks would be inappropriate.
Children know intuitively what is fair and right.
Adapted from Tamara Eberlein, Redbook, June 1993.
LEARN A WORD A DAY 5
galvanic \gal-VAN-ik\, adjective:
1. Of, pertaining to, or producing a direct current of electricity, especially when produced chemically.
2. Affecting or affected as if by an electric shock; startling; shocking.
3. Stimulating; energizing.
Reading the epic known to us as the Iliad is vastly different from the preliterate experience of hearing and seeing it performed. In place of the bard's galvanic flow of sound and image, the reader beholds a mute tome, the size of longish novel. --Michael E. Hobart and Zachary S. Schiffman, [1]Information Ages Hemingway's letters, which often seem to have been dashed off at the end of the day, display little of the galvanic style that animated his early (and finest) fiction. --Michiko Kakutani, "Tone It Down, He Urged Hemingway," [2]New York Times, November 19, 1996 What was special -- and at the time, galvanic -- about his early writing was its precision and concision. --Michiko Kakutani, "The Hunter Returns, Weary but Still Macho," [3]New York Times, June 22, 1999
1. Of, pertaining to, or producing a direct current of electricity, especially when produced chemically.
2. Affecting or affected as if by an electric shock; startling; shocking.
3. Stimulating; energizing.
Reading the epic known to us as the Iliad is vastly different from the preliterate experience of hearing and seeing it performed. In place of the bard's galvanic flow of sound and image, the reader beholds a mute tome, the size of longish novel. --Michael E. Hobart and Zachary S. Schiffman, [1]Information Ages Hemingway's letters, which often seem to have been dashed off at the end of the day, display little of the galvanic style that animated his early (and finest) fiction. --Michiko Kakutani, "Tone It Down, He Urged Hemingway," [2]New York Times, November 19, 1996 What was special -- and at the time, galvanic -- about his early writing was its precision and concision. --Michiko Kakutani, "The Hunter Returns, Weary but Still Macho," [3]New York Times, June 22, 1999
WHAT SAYS THE TABIB? 5
10 Tips for a Better Sleep
Feeling crabby lately? It could be you aren't getting enough sleep. Although the average adult needs seven to nine hours of sleep a night, that number could be hard to come by if you factor in work, taking care of children and managing a household. Then, there are the unexpected challenges that can keep you up at night — financial worries, layoffs, and illness or relationship issues.
Grumpiness isn't the only result of sleep deprivation. Getting too little sleep impairs memory, reaction time and alertness. Tired people are less productive at work, less patient with others and less interactive in relationships.
Try one or two of the following tips or a combination until you have enough quality sleep to feel alert and well rested. If these tips don't work, see your doctor. You could have a sleep disorder, such as obstructive sleep apnea, that requires medical attention.
1. Stick to a schedule, and don't sleep late on weekends. If you sleep late on Saturday and Sunday morning, you'll get Sunday night insomnia. Instead, go to bed and get up at about the same time every day.
2. Don't eat or drink a lot before bedtime. Eat a light dinner about two hours before sleeping. If you drink too much liquid before sleeping, you'll wake up repeatedly in the night for trips to the bathroom. Don’t eat spicy or fatty foods. They can cause heartburn, which may interfere with your sleep.
3. Avoid caffeine and nicotine. They're addictive stimulants and keep you awake. Smokers often experience withdrawal symptoms at night, and smoking in bed can be dangerous. Caffeine should be avoided for eight hours before your desired bedtime.
4. Exercise. If you're trying to sleep better, the best time to exercise is in the afternoon. A program of regular physical activity enhances the quality of nocturnal sleep.
5. A slightly cool room is ideal for sleeping. This mimics your internal temperature drop during sleep, so turn off the heat and save on fuel bills. If you tend to get cold, use blankets or wear socks. If you tend to over heat, wear light clothes and sleep under single sheets.
6. Sleep primarily at night. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep to less than one hour, no later than 3 p.m.
7. Keep it quiet. Silence is more conducive to sleep. Turn off the radio and TV. Use earplugs or a fan or some other source of constant, soothing, background noise to mask sounds you can't control, such as a busy street, trains, airplanes or even a snoring partner. Double-pane windows and heavy curtains also muffle outside noise.
8. Make your bed. A good bed is subjective and different for each person. Make sure you have a bed that is comfortable and offers orthopedic comfort. If you share your bed, make sure there’s enough room for all. Use your bed only for sleep and sex.
9. Soak and sack out. Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax tense muscles.
10. Don’t rely on sleeping pills. Use the lowest dosage. Try doing away with it gradually.
(Adapted from a relationship advice website in 2004)
Feeling crabby lately? It could be you aren't getting enough sleep. Although the average adult needs seven to nine hours of sleep a night, that number could be hard to come by if you factor in work, taking care of children and managing a household. Then, there are the unexpected challenges that can keep you up at night — financial worries, layoffs, and illness or relationship issues.
Grumpiness isn't the only result of sleep deprivation. Getting too little sleep impairs memory, reaction time and alertness. Tired people are less productive at work, less patient with others and less interactive in relationships.
Try one or two of the following tips or a combination until you have enough quality sleep to feel alert and well rested. If these tips don't work, see your doctor. You could have a sleep disorder, such as obstructive sleep apnea, that requires medical attention.
1. Stick to a schedule, and don't sleep late on weekends. If you sleep late on Saturday and Sunday morning, you'll get Sunday night insomnia. Instead, go to bed and get up at about the same time every day.
2. Don't eat or drink a lot before bedtime. Eat a light dinner about two hours before sleeping. If you drink too much liquid before sleeping, you'll wake up repeatedly in the night for trips to the bathroom. Don’t eat spicy or fatty foods. They can cause heartburn, which may interfere with your sleep.
3. Avoid caffeine and nicotine. They're addictive stimulants and keep you awake. Smokers often experience withdrawal symptoms at night, and smoking in bed can be dangerous. Caffeine should be avoided for eight hours before your desired bedtime.
4. Exercise. If you're trying to sleep better, the best time to exercise is in the afternoon. A program of regular physical activity enhances the quality of nocturnal sleep.
5. A slightly cool room is ideal for sleeping. This mimics your internal temperature drop during sleep, so turn off the heat and save on fuel bills. If you tend to get cold, use blankets or wear socks. If you tend to over heat, wear light clothes and sleep under single sheets.
6. Sleep primarily at night. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep to less than one hour, no later than 3 p.m.
7. Keep it quiet. Silence is more conducive to sleep. Turn off the radio and TV. Use earplugs or a fan or some other source of constant, soothing, background noise to mask sounds you can't control, such as a busy street, trains, airplanes or even a snoring partner. Double-pane windows and heavy curtains also muffle outside noise.
8. Make your bed. A good bed is subjective and different for each person. Make sure you have a bed that is comfortable and offers orthopedic comfort. If you share your bed, make sure there’s enough room for all. Use your bed only for sleep and sex.
9. Soak and sack out. Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax tense muscles.
10. Don’t rely on sleeping pills. Use the lowest dosage. Try doing away with it gradually.
(Adapted from a relationship advice website in 2004)
TIPS FOR US-NESS 6
This issue’s tips may seem short but I believe they are very useful ones especially most of us are young parents with small kids. We spend too much time on our kids that we some time forget about the people who brought the kids into the world – US!
To enhance your relationship with your life partner:
Just one five minute connection a day can make for a happier marriage. So go ahead and spend five minutes.
Cuddle at the most important time of the day.
Most couples fit their cuddles in at the end of the day, but cuddling in the morning is even more rewarding. The physical contact will keep you feeling close to each other all day, so set the alarm five minutes early, and then snuggle. You can talk, but you don't have to. The most important part is that you're holding each other. It'll help you both start the day feeling loved, and you'll feel that way all day long.
Ask each other one simple question before you head out the door.
What is it? "Anything special going on today?" Talking about the daily details of our lives is just as important to couples as sharing hopes, dreams, and fears with each other. The nitty-gritty details determine a lot of how we act and feel on any given day, so asking about them is a great way to build understanding and rapport. Then, when you're together again at the end of the day, ask how that special something -- that meeting, phone call to an important client, or lunch with a friend went. The results? You'll feel connected.
Share what you like about each other
When a conversation about cars sprang up at a gathering with friends, one woman gave her husband credit for making their old clunker last with his TLC. She later said, "He looked so happy, I realized I should tell him more often how much I appreciate the things he does. I didn't think I had to tell him. I assumed he knew how much I appreciate him." The moral? If there's something you appreciate about your partner, from his parenting skills to the way he painted the garage last month, speak up! If you start, you may enjoy the same treatment from your husband. How does praise work magic? It reminds your partner that you love them, and knowing they're loved makes them more willing to iron out differences.
Do small kindnesses for each other
The good we do for our partner tends to come back to us. When you're thoughtful to your partner, they're inclined to be thoughtful in return. And those acts of kindness make for a loving feeling between two people. So pick up each other's favorite dessert, or clip articles you think your spouse might like. The amount of love those small kindnesses will bring you is without limit.
Use this instant stress buster
One of the most important things we've discovered about happy couples is that they spend five minutes griping to each other about things that stressed them out during the day, taking turns talking. This lowers the amount of stress they feel and lets them enjoy the rest of their evening together.
I hope we all benefit from these tips and practice them everyday. Once they become habitual, you needn’t remind yourself anymore as they will happen naturally. Good luck!
(Adapted from a relationship advice website in 2004)
To enhance your relationship with your life partner:
Just one five minute connection a day can make for a happier marriage. So go ahead and spend five minutes.
Cuddle at the most important time of the day.
Most couples fit their cuddles in at the end of the day, but cuddling in the morning is even more rewarding. The physical contact will keep you feeling close to each other all day, so set the alarm five minutes early, and then snuggle. You can talk, but you don't have to. The most important part is that you're holding each other. It'll help you both start the day feeling loved, and you'll feel that way all day long.
Ask each other one simple question before you head out the door.
What is it? "Anything special going on today?" Talking about the daily details of our lives is just as important to couples as sharing hopes, dreams, and fears with each other. The nitty-gritty details determine a lot of how we act and feel on any given day, so asking about them is a great way to build understanding and rapport. Then, when you're together again at the end of the day, ask how that special something -- that meeting, phone call to an important client, or lunch with a friend went. The results? You'll feel connected.
Share what you like about each other
When a conversation about cars sprang up at a gathering with friends, one woman gave her husband credit for making their old clunker last with his TLC. She later said, "He looked so happy, I realized I should tell him more often how much I appreciate the things he does. I didn't think I had to tell him. I assumed he knew how much I appreciate him." The moral? If there's something you appreciate about your partner, from his parenting skills to the way he painted the garage last month, speak up! If you start, you may enjoy the same treatment from your husband. How does praise work magic? It reminds your partner that you love them, and knowing they're loved makes them more willing to iron out differences.
Do small kindnesses for each other
The good we do for our partner tends to come back to us. When you're thoughtful to your partner, they're inclined to be thoughtful in return. And those acts of kindness make for a loving feeling between two people. So pick up each other's favorite dessert, or clip articles you think your spouse might like. The amount of love those small kindnesses will bring you is without limit.
Use this instant stress buster
One of the most important things we've discovered about happy couples is that they spend five minutes griping to each other about things that stressed them out during the day, taking turns talking. This lowers the amount of stress they feel and lets them enjoy the rest of their evening together.
I hope we all benefit from these tips and practice them everyday. Once they become habitual, you needn’t remind yourself anymore as they will happen naturally. Good luck!
(Adapted from a relationship advice website in 2004)
FEATURE STORY 5
American Idol Syndrome
(Written on 15 April 2004)
So, what’s the most talked about TV show now? Some might say CSI. Some others might suggest Friends. Or maybe it’s Gerak Khas? Well, I am not sure anymore but I guessed the show that everybody seemed to be watching now is American Idol. Even my 4-year old is willing to sacrifice his Cartoon Network for this and Explorace, too.
When we mention American Idol, I couldn’t help but to fall back on Akademi Fantasia the first season. I remembered when my cousins were all into the show starting from week one and I was left in awe, what is it with the show that they liked it so much? It must be quite interesting then especially when they gave up Coffee Bean, Starbucks or even the movies on each Saturday night just to be home to watch the weekly concert. Then, my turn came. I started becoming addicted to the show. I was truly mesmerised by Burn before he was voted out. Afterwards, it shifted to Vince and I could recall the fact that I used up RM198 on the final concert night simply because I desperately wanted Vince to get the Champion title. Something to laugh about? Yeah, I should think so.
Now, it’s American Idol. Almost everyone at work talks about William Hung. Hung this, Hung that, here Hung, there Hung. Again, I was left to marvel alone. Who the heck is this William Hung guy? Is he a new singer? They were associating him with the song “She Bangs” and so I said to myself that maybe he’s just as sexy, hot and good looking as Ricky Martin.
One night, while I was browsing through the TV channels from RTM 1 to RTM 2 to TV3 and to NTV7, there was nothing interesting to settle with. Next, I pressed number 6 on my remote control, and there it was – an ad where clips of contestants were shown on this singing contest. There was this plain looking Chinese guy who was shaking his way through a song that sounded like “She Bangs.” After that the TV said, don’t forget every Friday at 9.45 pm on 8TV and the results at 3 pm every Saturday – American Idol. Ah ha! This is it! Yes! I found it. The TV show that Malaysians are watching now.
Honestly speaking, in my truest opinion, the best part of the show is the segment on the judges’ comments. I really love Simon Cowell. I think he is truthful. He is honest. He doesn’t lie. He says what he thinks is right for the sake of a singing career. And I believe that is the
best practise and exposure a star could ever get because once they become a star, there are more than just Simon Cowell they have to face out there. So many challenges. So many obstacles. Infinite barriers.
And yesterday, I saw the ad on Malaysian Idol coming to town. You might think it’s great but I beg to differ. There are already a few in the market – Akademi Fantasia, Bintang RTM, Who Will Win and etc. What happened to the winners anyway? As it is, only Siti became popular and rich. She is the only one worth mentioning. Next, is Vince. He just released his debut album. Do you think he’ll sell like Siti did? Even Enrique Iglesias couldn’t sell his concert tickets in Kuala Lumpur, Hong Kong and also Manila. What would make Vince different, then? What about the others? Where have they gone to?
Many of our young, new singers became recording artistes not because they’re rightly talented but most of them are chasing the glitters and glimmers of show business. Which I think is not permanent. Neither does it warrant a better living. A huge number of them didn’t even complete high school with commendable results or maybe didn’t finish high school at all! Some of them just disappeared after one album. Is this the kind of future generation we’re creating for our beloved country?
Don’t compare us with the US. It’s undoubtedly beyond comparison. In the states, one can definitely make a living with singing. Not just that. One can make a living with dancing, acting, playing musical instruments, sports – in short, one can make money by doing just about anything! And mind you, some even get filthy rich because of that. But is that possible here in Malaysia? Maybe not now. Maybe in 30 years time. Or maybe not ever. Do you dream of your child becoming the next Malaysian Idol? Will you allow him to be in showbiz one day? Does it make you proud if he is on every magazine cover in Malaysia? Tell me about it.
The more I watch American Idol, the more I couldn’t imagine how it is going to be like in Malaysia. It is so much fun running through the audition tapes over and over again. It is funny when we see how people in the states would do whatever it takes just to get to the audition stage. Now, the show is almost reaching its finale. There were 12 finalists at the beginning, all of whom, none of the 12 finalists of AF was anywhere near their standards. As it goes by, one will be voted out each week. It’s only left with 8 finalists now, excluding the pretty Leah La Belle, the macho Matthew Rogers, the funky Amy Adams and the sexy Camile Velasco. Who will be going home next? We’ll wait and see.
In the meantime, let’s ponder over the coming Malaysian Idol and see whether another Siti Nurhaliza will be created. Or maybe another Kelly Clarkson or Gareth Gates or even Guy Sebastian. Hopefully, one day, Malaysians will be able to make a great living out of a singing career, who knows?
(Written on 15 April 2004)
So, what’s the most talked about TV show now? Some might say CSI. Some others might suggest Friends. Or maybe it’s Gerak Khas? Well, I am not sure anymore but I guessed the show that everybody seemed to be watching now is American Idol. Even my 4-year old is willing to sacrifice his Cartoon Network for this and Explorace, too.
When we mention American Idol, I couldn’t help but to fall back on Akademi Fantasia the first season. I remembered when my cousins were all into the show starting from week one and I was left in awe, what is it with the show that they liked it so much? It must be quite interesting then especially when they gave up Coffee Bean, Starbucks or even the movies on each Saturday night just to be home to watch the weekly concert. Then, my turn came. I started becoming addicted to the show. I was truly mesmerised by Burn before he was voted out. Afterwards, it shifted to Vince and I could recall the fact that I used up RM198 on the final concert night simply because I desperately wanted Vince to get the Champion title. Something to laugh about? Yeah, I should think so.
Now, it’s American Idol. Almost everyone at work talks about William Hung. Hung this, Hung that, here Hung, there Hung. Again, I was left to marvel alone. Who the heck is this William Hung guy? Is he a new singer? They were associating him with the song “She Bangs” and so I said to myself that maybe he’s just as sexy, hot and good looking as Ricky Martin.
One night, while I was browsing through the TV channels from RTM 1 to RTM 2 to TV3 and to NTV7, there was nothing interesting to settle with. Next, I pressed number 6 on my remote control, and there it was – an ad where clips of contestants were shown on this singing contest. There was this plain looking Chinese guy who was shaking his way through a song that sounded like “She Bangs.” After that the TV said, don’t forget every Friday at 9.45 pm on 8TV and the results at 3 pm every Saturday – American Idol. Ah ha! This is it! Yes! I found it. The TV show that Malaysians are watching now.
Honestly speaking, in my truest opinion, the best part of the show is the segment on the judges’ comments. I really love Simon Cowell. I think he is truthful. He is honest. He doesn’t lie. He says what he thinks is right for the sake of a singing career. And I believe that is the
best practise and exposure a star could ever get because once they become a star, there are more than just Simon Cowell they have to face out there. So many challenges. So many obstacles. Infinite barriers.
And yesterday, I saw the ad on Malaysian Idol coming to town. You might think it’s great but I beg to differ. There are already a few in the market – Akademi Fantasia, Bintang RTM, Who Will Win and etc. What happened to the winners anyway? As it is, only Siti became popular and rich. She is the only one worth mentioning. Next, is Vince. He just released his debut album. Do you think he’ll sell like Siti did? Even Enrique Iglesias couldn’t sell his concert tickets in Kuala Lumpur, Hong Kong and also Manila. What would make Vince different, then? What about the others? Where have they gone to?
Many of our young, new singers became recording artistes not because they’re rightly talented but most of them are chasing the glitters and glimmers of show business. Which I think is not permanent. Neither does it warrant a better living. A huge number of them didn’t even complete high school with commendable results or maybe didn’t finish high school at all! Some of them just disappeared after one album. Is this the kind of future generation we’re creating for our beloved country?
Don’t compare us with the US. It’s undoubtedly beyond comparison. In the states, one can definitely make a living with singing. Not just that. One can make a living with dancing, acting, playing musical instruments, sports – in short, one can make money by doing just about anything! And mind you, some even get filthy rich because of that. But is that possible here in Malaysia? Maybe not now. Maybe in 30 years time. Or maybe not ever. Do you dream of your child becoming the next Malaysian Idol? Will you allow him to be in showbiz one day? Does it make you proud if he is on every magazine cover in Malaysia? Tell me about it.
The more I watch American Idol, the more I couldn’t imagine how it is going to be like in Malaysia. It is so much fun running through the audition tapes over and over again. It is funny when we see how people in the states would do whatever it takes just to get to the audition stage. Now, the show is almost reaching its finale. There were 12 finalists at the beginning, all of whom, none of the 12 finalists of AF was anywhere near their standards. As it goes by, one will be voted out each week. It’s only left with 8 finalists now, excluding the pretty Leah La Belle, the macho Matthew Rogers, the funky Amy Adams and the sexy Camile Velasco. Who will be going home next? We’ll wait and see.
In the meantime, let’s ponder over the coming Malaysian Idol and see whether another Siti Nurhaliza will be created. Or maybe another Kelly Clarkson or Gareth Gates or even Guy Sebastian. Hopefully, one day, Malaysians will be able to make a great living out of a singing career, who knows?
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