FEATURE STORY 4

The Wedding Day Fairytale
(Written on 31 March 2004)

It is still very fresh in my mind how it felt like a few days counting down to my wedding day. Now, the feelings come rushing in all over again. Not because I’m getting married again but because my sister-in-law is going to tie the knot this weekend.

It was just like yesterday that I was going through all the hassles and sleepless nights. Imagine this – the decision to be married was made within a month and a half. I never thought it was a reality at the time. All the while I kept pinching and shaking myself ensuring that it was not merely a sweet dream because if it was then I never wanted to wake up!

Who would ever think that a man you met just a few weeks ago would be your lawful wedded husband? Well, I definitely didn’t.

They all started with my aunt (Mak Andak) and my mom-in-law ended up sharing the same hotel room in Kelantan one fine day. They were on a short three-day trip there under the Women Institution program of their kampong. According to Mak Andak, she was supposed to share a room with another lady but when she entered that room the lady had already found her own room mate and politely requested Mak Andak to look for another.

So, while Mak Andak was browsing for a room on the same floor, my mom-in-law was also doing the same. Then, they saw an empty room, still unoccupied and decided to stay in together. That night, they took the opportunity to catch up on old times. It had been long since they last talked and saw each other. The casual chat brought about the story that my mom-in-law was searching for a suitable girl to match her eldest son with.

Guess what happened next? Mak Andak mentioned that she has a niece who is still single at 25. And my mom-in-law immediately asked if Mak Andak could help match us together. That was where and how it all began…

To cut the story short, a month and a half after that, we were already preparing for our big day. I was all the time nervous. I was afraid if it was not the right thing to do. I was always asking myself whether this man would actually make me happy. Would he love me sincerely? Would he be there for me forever? Would he accept me for better and for worse? In sickness and in health? Till death do us part? Would he be loyal till eternity? And most importantly, would I be able to love him back dearly?

Then, I told myself…never mind, maybe I should just give it a shot and if it didn’t work I’d figure a way to get myself out from the mess. Funny, huh? I made it sound so easy. As if marriage was a playful thing. As if marriage was for a day or two. As if the tie would not mean a thing.

When the same puzzle was projected to my future husband (at the time), he told me to perform the “hajat” and “istikharah” prayers. He, too, did not want to commit into something uncertain. What did you expect? We’ve only known each other in a blink of the eyes. So, the only way was to ask God as He is the only one who knows everything and beyond.

After our wedding on July 31, 1999, things were difficult for the both of us. We were starting too many relationships at one time. We were trying to be friends. We were trying to be lovers. We were trying to be husband and wife. We were also trying to be son-in-law and daughter-in-law. But worst of all, I had two additional tasks – learning to be the “big” sister to his siblings and “mak long” to his nieces and nephews. I found it darn hard because I am an only child.

Three years down the road, new leaves began to take over. I could trust him more, and he too. We went through the first serious huge barrier together, and succeeded. I was slowly feeling that I could fit into the gloves nicely then. There were fewer arguments. Fights were almost none. Happiness was gradually embarking on us. We missed each other if one of us had to be away. I, too, frequently pray that we would be together until the day we die. And I settled myself by saying that the salad days are leaving us little by little.

Now, after 5 fruitful years, I can confidently say that I am so thankful I took the step to marry my husband. I believe this is the best decision I ever committed myself into. Nothing else has ever felt so right before. Each passing day I put my palms up and pray that God will bless this marriage and allow us to stick together through thick and thin and most of all to only let death tear us apart, inshaAllah…

And to our beloved son, Yadiy Furqan, you are the most precious bond that binds us close and tight and we love you with all our hearts.

Added on 28 April 2008 - And to our beautiful daughters, Faqihah Yamna (born: 6 May 2004), Fajriyah Yubdina (born: 8 Feb 2006), and Farisah Yasmyne (born: 26 Feb 2007), you are the jewels in our hearts and you are what that keep us going.